Darke [Part 1] Read online

  Three hours? Three hours!

  I started getting ready, and also I took a moment and googled Keller. He’d been linked to Olivia Dawn, Bebe Evers, Mara Deneuve and, it seemed, a lot of the cool, cult-status it-girl actresses in the past few years. Actresses who won oscars, and actresses who died of heroin overdoses. He seemed to have a taste for the jaded and troubled.

  I shuddered.

  Had he, I wondered, slept with all of them? Had he hurt some of them? I looked at a picture from GQ, a black and white portrait from a profile they’d done. He looked into the camera with an almost savage, mocking expression, his eyes sparkling. He was, I knew already, capable of cruelty and charm. He was so, so gorgeous, something even his less savory qualities couldn’t diminish.

  I stared at his picture, reading quotes from the article.

  “I’m married to my work, and women are for play,” he said, “love is for boring people.”

  I read it over and over, until I realized what time it was and had to rush to get ready, straightening my hair and putting on eyeliner with a slightly shaking hand.

  To say I was nervous would be a massive understatement.

  I was standing outside, holding my cheap handbag tightly and wearing a snug black dress, a dress I really couldn’t afford, when the sleek black BMW M6 rolled up silently to my curb. I knew instantly that it was Keller, who emerged and opened the passenger side door without a word. The way he looked at me was somber, serious, like he wasn’t happy about what he was going to do.

  I remembered something my dad had told me, don’t date a guy who doesn’t open doors for you, and got into the car.

  “Thanks for the part,” I said quietly, unsure if I should even thank him.

  He’d humiliated me for it.

  “I’ve been thinking of you,” he said in his deep voice, his strange accent.

  “Thinking about me how,” I asked, feeling nervous energy rise in me.

  My heart was beating fast.

  “Thinking that I want to use you and break you, make you wish you’d never met me,” he said ominously.

  “Is that what you did to Olivia Dawn, to all the other women you’ve dated?”

  Keller laughed.

  “No, they were broken long before I met them. Most people in LA are. Hollow and broken and vacant,” he said, “but not you.”

  “I feel like that’s changing quickly,” I said, a terrible feeling in my gut.

  “You don’t have to do this,” Keller said, “we don’t have to…”

  “I want to,” I said, “I’m here… I’m here on my own free will.”

  “You’re really a virgin?”

  “Yes,” I whispered.

  “Ok,” Keller said, nodding, “ok, ok, well, tonight I’m going to take your virginity.”

  “Alright,,” I said, feeling a little shiver pass over me, “anything you want.”

  “You have no idea what I’m going to make you do.”

  “Hurt me? Slap me? Hit me?” I said, “I can take it.”

  “Some of that, sure,” he said, “but I’ll also find other ways to use you.”

  I sat silently.

  “I’ll humiliate you, I’ll degrade you, I’ll push you to your limits, and then I’ll break them, I’ll make you forget who you ever were before,” he said.

  I felt like I was making a deal with the devil.

  I looked over at Keller. His eyes burned brightly as he looked out to the road, his profile like a statue of a Roman god of war. I wondered for a moment why he wasn’t an actor… he was hot enough.

  “I’ll do it,” I breathed.

  “You’ll probably hate me one day,” Keller said.

  “I kind of already hate you,” I answered him with a small, pathetic laugh.

  He smirked devilishly, but said nothing.

  We drove up into the Hollywood Hills, where mansions with huge lit up windows looked down onto the city… looked down onto little, disposable people like me.

  “I don’t normally go for this sort of thing. For virgins.”

  Keller was looking at me from across the room as I lay in his bed, wearing my panties and a lacy bralette. He’d told me to strip and I’d complied. I tried to stay cool, tried to relax as I laid back in the bed, but I was terrified.

  “You just seem so… innocent, yet so… willing,” Keller said. He’d taken off his jacket and was wearing an impeccable white shirt. His arms were crossed, but in one hand he held a small glass tumbler with just a splash of whiskey. I wished he’d offer me a drink, but he seemed to be enjoying the tension, seemed to like that my nerves were jumping.

  “Take off your bra,” he said.

  I think he liked watching my hands shake as I unclipped behind my back. I was blushing and my heart was racing. My breasts fell from the bra.

  “You have great tits,” Keller said, “not too big, not fake. That’s exactly what I like. I want to put some nipple clamps on them and make you beg for me to take them off while I fuck you. But not tonight.”

  I looked into his eyes pleadingly. The tension as I waited on him to make his move, to come closer to me, was excruciating.

  I wanted him.

  I was afraid of him.

  I was attracted to him with every fiber of my being, and I was disgusted by him.

  “Take off your panties,” he said. My hands shook, but I did as I was told, arching my hips and sliding the silk panties down over my thighs.

  I stared up at the ceiling, my chest heaving with my rapid breath.

  “Touch yourself,” Keller said quietly.

  “What?” I asked, unsure of what he meant.

  “I want to watch you pleasure yourself,” he said shortly, “put your hand between your legs and touch yourself so I know how to touch you.”

  “I…I… ummm…”

  “You’ve never done that before?” he scoffed.

  I trembled and shut my eyes.

  “No,” I admitted.

  “Put your fingers against your clit, and give yourself some soft strokes,” he instructed.

  It seemed like his voice had maybe softened just the tiniest bit.

  I did as he told me to do, pressing my fingers against myself and gently stroking. I felt little tremors of pleasure in my belly, a warmth spreading inside of me.

  I breathed a sigh and felt myself relax ever so slightly.

  “Good girl,” he said gently, “does that feel good?”

  The edge in his voice was gone.

  “Yes,” I whispered.

  “Are you wet?” he asked quietly, taking a step toward me.

  “I think so,” I said, touching myself. I was slippery and felt needy, a surge of feelings of want like I’d never had.

  “Do you want me to fuck you, Selma?”

  “I don’t know,” I said, my eyes shut tight.

  “If you don’t want to, neither do I,” he said, “I mean than. Now, do you want me to fuck you?”

  “Yes,” I whispered.

  I realized I meant it.

  Keller unbuttoned his shirt, sliding it off fluidly. He peeled off his undershirt and, as I continued to rub my swelling sex, dropped his dark grey pants to the floor. He had a intricate tattoo on his left shoulder, and another smaller one across his chest over his pectoral. I couldn’t see them well in the dim light.

  Keller lowered himself over me into the bed, looking down at me with an intensity that I was unsettled by, his eyes burning into mine.

  “You’re beautiful, Selma,” he said quietly, his strong, tight body hovering over me. I wanted to touch him, to run my hands over those muscular, sinewy arms and his rippling stomach, but I was too nervous to move.

  He reached between my legs and slid his fingers between my lips, stroking gently.

  “You’re so wet,” he whispered, his breath against my neck.

  “Please,” I sighed.

  What, I wondered, was I begging for?

  He stroked me and kissed my neck and chest, his breath hot, his lips soft and
warm.

  I felt his cock, the thick head of him pressed against me. I felt an ache of need as he kissed me.

  “Are you sure,” he asked.

  “Yes,” I said pleadingly.

  The pain wasn’t unbearable, but it was sudden and shocking. I felt impaled. I felt invaded.

  I felt like I was split in two and transformed in a moment from one person to another. An innocent, terrified girl and a hungry woman, filled with need and determination.

  He began, very, very slowly, to slide in and out of me in smooth, controlled strokes.

  “You feel incredible,” he said into my ear.

  I bit my lip and groaned. I felt hot pain and undulations of powerful pleasure.

  Keller stroked me, and sank his teeth gently but firmly, into my neck.

  I felt the wave of pleasure building up, and I whimpered as Keller’s steady strokes and firm hand send me tumbling into a warm ocean of pleasure that seemed to erase all pain. I cried out, and Keller seemed to be turned on greatly, seemed to lose control. He fucked me hard, powerful strokes penetrating me over and over. I wrapped my arms around him, pressed my hands into his strong back, the ropy muscles moving beneath them.

  Suddenly, Keller kissed me on the lips, as though he almost couldn’t stop himself, and groaned.

  He came inside of me. My thoughts were swirling, and I couldn’t comprehend what that might mean.

  He rolled into the bed beside me and we both stared up at the ceiling. For a moment it seemed like he was just as astonished as I was.

  “You can stay the night,” he said quietly, “but this is the only time.”

  I turned to him, searching for something. A sign that he was human, that he thought of me as more than just an object, a toy to play with. He glanced over at me and our eyes locked. He’d just taken my virginity, had come inside of me. We looked at each other for a long moment, and then he rolled over, turned off the light, and went, I presumed, to sleep.

  Darke

  What had I done? She lay sleeping beside me, her breath even and measured, her body warm and sweet smelling, and I hated myself.

  She was beautiful, I had wanted her, and I had taken her. I told myself there was nothing different about her, really, and someone else would have done it eventually. She said she wanted to be broken, didn’t she?

  She knew, on some level, what she was signing up for.

  I hardly slept. I hate having someone else in my bed, and in the morning I got up and got dressed for my run alone, leaving her there sleeping with that innocent look on her face. I ran through the hills, pushing myself hard, letting Kanye thump loud in my earbuds, wanting to drown out my thoughts.

  My inner voice told me that I was doing something stupid, that by hooking up with Selma I had lost a little bit of control. She was… different, and I knew it, the kind of girl I had always tried to avoid, the kind of girl who says she knows the drill, but really still believes in idiotic notions like true love, or finding ‘the one.’

  A part of me had wanted to protect her, but I’d let my dick overrule.

  Anyway, I wasn’t in the business of protecting people.

  When I came back from my run, Selma was already sitting up, and turned as I walked through my bedroom door. A part of me had wanted her to magically be gone by the time I got back, but there she was, her big, innocent eyes looking up at me with expectation.

  I thought about running my hands along her arms, tying her to my bed with the sheets, and having my way with her again, but it wasn’t a habit I wanted to start.

  I pressed a few buttons on my phone, summoning an Uber.

  “Hey,” I said, pulling out my headphones and slipping off my t-shirt.

  “Good morning,” she said, sliding out of bed with the blanket wrapped around her like I hadn’t already seen her naked.

  “I, uh,” I made my way to the shower, “I just called you a car, they’ll be here in fifteen minutes.

  “Oh, ok, sure,” she said, sounding a little disappointed.

  “Yeah, I’ll see you on set in a few days,” I turned on my shower, glancing over my shoulder.

  She was looking for her clothes, getting dressed, looking at me furtively. We locked eyes, and I turned back to my shower, the image of her beautiful body bent over as she searched for her shoe seared into my mind. I wanted to cancel the car, throw her on the bed, and take her again, but I was already feeling so conflicted, like I should have nothing to do with her, shouldn’t have cast her.

  “Bye, I guess,” she said, calling to me from my bedroom.

  I stepped into my shower, pretending not to hear.

  Chapter 3

  Showing up to the studio on the first day of work was surreal. Hollywood studios are like they seem in the movies, but also mundane workplaces. I was supposed to be in a conference room at one in the afternoon to meet with the director and some of the other actors, actually famous Hollywood actors.

  “You’re Annie?” a voice I recognized made me turn around as I sat waiting in a sparse lobby. I turned and saw a instantly recognizable face. Colin Wellesly, the famous Scottish actor, was looking at me with questioning grey eyes.

  “I’m Selma,” I squeaked, unable to believe my eyes.

  “Er… Right,” he said in his dashing Scottish accent, “but you’re playing Annie, right?”

  “Oh, yes, sorry, oh my god,” I laughed nervously, “I’m a little nervous… this is my first role.”

  Colin smiled warmly. He was wildly charismatic, and it was obvious why he was a movie star, famous the world over.

  “Oh, how cute,” he said with a kind laugh, reaching his hand, “I’m Colin.”

  We shook hands and he opened the conference room door for me. We went inside, where Keller, and two other men were having a meeting before the script reading.

  “Our two stars!” one man said, standing up. He was older, maybe fifty, and reached out towards my hand to shake it.

  “I’m Melvin Sykes,” he said, looking me over slowly, appraising me, “you look great, perfect.”

  “Oh, thanks,” I said nervously, glancing over at Keller. He looked at me with a hard, serious stare.

  “She is beautiful, isn’t she,” Keller said, “and she’s the real thing, innocent little country girl from Indiana.”

  I blushed with embarrassment.

  “This is Marty Grahm,” Keller said, indicating the other man at the table, another man in a suit.

  “Nice to meet you,” I said, nodding to him.

  “Have you read the script?” Melvin asked, turning to me and Colin.

  “Oh, yeah, it’s great,” I said, smiling brightly, “I can’t wait to read through.”

  “We’re not really going to read through the script,” Keller said with a short laugh, “how boring would that be? Everyone just wanted to get a look at our two stars, get a feel for you.”

  “Oh,” I said.

  “Can you stand up for us?” Martin said, licking his lips slightly and leaning back.

  I hesitantly did as he asked, letting him take me in.

  I listened while the men in the room discussed everything from shooting locations to salaries. My salary had already been hammered out with my agent, so I listened passively, feeling at moments both conflicted and numb.

  “Ok, so shooting starts in two weeks, we’ll meet again Monday, and you have my assistant’s number if you need me,” Keller finally said, standing up, indicating that the meeting was over “Selma, do you need a ride or are you taking a car?”

  “Oh, uh, I’ll take a ride,” I said, slightly startled that he’d addressed me.

  “Great, let’s go,” he said.

  I followed him out of the room feeling like an obedient dog. I was pretty sure everyone already knew we were sleeping together.

  “Are you ok?” he asked as he revved the engine of his Audi.

  “I don’t know if I’m cut out for this, with you,” I said honestly.

  Keller smirked.

  “That’s what I
like about you,” he said, “you have principles… or you did.”

  I winced.

  “I did, but now I’m not sure I am who I thought I was,” I said, looking out the window as palm trees rushed past.

  “You are who I say you are now,” he said quietly, “and I say you’re a slut, hungry and ready to do anything I say.”

  I felt a pulse of angry desire for him. I thought of that beautiful, muscular body underneath the slim fitting suit he wore. I hated the words he said, even as they turned me on.

  “Where are we going?”

  “Chateau Marmont,” he said, “it’s close to your apartment and I need to fuck you right now.”

  I glanced over at him. He didn’t look at me. He seemed driven by need, revving the engine into fifth gear as we pulled out onto the freeway.

  We arrived at the famed Hollywood hotel, and as soon as we walked in, heads seemed to turn. Some people were looking for a celebrity and were disappointed, others were looking for a leg up, and instantly recognized the powerful movie producer. He totally eclipsed me, it seemed, made me invisible with his power, a power that everyone wanted and few had.

  I felt suddenly nervous with all of the strange eyes on me and edged closer to Keller who, to my surprise, draped an arm around me protectively.

  “Everyone is… staring…”

  “Ignore them,” he said under his breath.

  “Mr. Darke,” the girl at the front desk said as we approached, her eyes wide with recognition “your usual room is available, is that the one you want?”

  “Sure,” he said, tossing her a black American Express card.

  In moments we had key cards and were heading for the elevator.

  Once in the room, Keller lead me towards the bed and undressed me quickly. My hands shot up to cover myself, an instinct I’d yet to learn to control, and he firmly removed them, forcing them to my sides.